Epistle from Cyprus VI - 11th November 2006
Apologies for the length of time between this and the previous note. I am afraid the Muses have literally deserted me. This morning however I have just returned from a walk around the old market part of Paphos. To put it in context you must first know a little about the current state of Cyprus. Cyprus is in the middle of a development frenzy. There is new building work almost everywhere you look. Every other shop is a real estate agent and almost everything appears to revolve around tourism and selling property to foreigners.
The old market next to the abandoned mosque in Paphos next is a small island in this storm of building activity. There are a group of old-fashioned open fronted shops with their owners making every conceivable object from metal and wood. Tables, chairs, cabinets, pots, pans, buckets and all made by hand in front of your eyes. Amid this the old ladies scurry back and forth from their coffee shops to the store owners carrying small cups of thick strong Greek coffee. Each coffee cup only the size of an egg cup but always accompanied by a glass of water. In front of the coffee shops the taxi drivers sit and play backgammon and small groups of passers-by gather to watch. The smell of the coffee, the wood from the carpenter’s shops is wonderful. Nearby there is a small street where the villagers from outlying towns come to sell their produce. Apples, pears, nuts, beans, fresh vegetables and host of other things that I do not recognize and certainly could not pronounce the Greek names. This is a world away from the large supermarkets and modern antiseptic malls I am more familiar with.
Old fossils in Cyprus
So you thought I was the only old fossil here. Seems that the BBC are on my trail. I am expecting a camera crew at the door any moment.
Check this out http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/6043648.stm
Kleftiko
In a previous note I mentioned eating a local specialty dish 'kleftiko'. The origins of the word Kleftiko are from 'kleftis' meaning a thief. The 'kleftiko' is traditionally a sheep or goat that has been stolen and then cooked in a shallow pit dug by the poachers. Nowadays the meat is purchased from the butcher and cooked in one of the traditional ovens.
At Jimmy the scouser’s housewarming/leaving party kleftiko was prepared and cooked by Jimmy's landlord Christakis (or Chris as he is known by the ex-pats). I say housewarming/leaving because Jimmy has never actually stayed there and has now gone back to the UK to nurse his lady friend while she convalesces from her cataract operation.
The food was delicious and afterwards Chris told a story of how when he was a boy in Northern Cyprus before partition he and his brother went walking in the mountains where his grandfather's goats were grazing. While there they smelled kleftiko cooking and after searching up and down wind they discovered a goat roasting inside a hidden pit dug in the ground and covered with the goatskin and branches and leaves. As they waited an old man with the traditional Greek handle-bar mustache approached carrying a flagon of red wine. It was apparent that he was the thief who had returned to enjoy his booty.
He sat down and invited them to drink a large cup of the wine even though they far too young. They refused at first but he was so insistent they eventually agreed and had a large cup of wine each. The old man did not drink. When they had finished the drink the old man uncovered the kleftiko to eat. The two boys however could hardly eat a thing. The old man told them how he had tricked them both as by drinking the wine first had sated their appetite and he would now eat the lion's share of the goat. He then proceeded to eat the entire goat while the two boys looked on.
Weather
Do not let anyone tell you that it does not rain in Cyprus. This is not true. What they mean is for long summer months there is no rain at all. Then when it does decide to rain they have some truly awesome storms. The thunder and lightning has to be seen to be believed and the hailstones well... if I told you they were as big as golf balls that would be a lie however they are big enough to put dents in the bonnet of your car and tear holes in the fly screens on the windows.
We sat and watched while the planes continued to try and land at Paphos airport in the middle of this storm. The lightning was flashing on all sides of the planes and they appeared so pathetic and fragile. Yes I have seen the Van Der Graaf generator tests (For the sad old ones reading this I am talking Robert J. and not the 70s rock band) and I know the theory that the electrostatic charge only touches the very surface of the object it strikes but theory goes out the window when put to so practical a test. It did nothing for my pteromerhanophobia and only confirmed my prejudice that airline companies care nothing for passenger safety and only for profit. Heaven help the poor people who were up there in those planes trying to land before they closed the airport.
I have started to attend night school classes in Greek in a village called Emba a little further down the hill. Last Monday night's class was held in the middle of a mighty thunder and lightning storm. The class had just started when the school building shook to its foundations as it was struck by lightning. Being in a building which is struck by lightning is not an experience I care to repeat. We lost all power except to the alarms so class for that evening was cancelled. Almost as bad was the car journey home as the roads that lead up the hills had turned to Water courses for the flooding. Only later did I find out that another car with a husband and wife in it driving between Emba and another village had been swept away into a ravine by the torrent. As I write this they are still searching for the body of one of the occupants.
The rain did have a couple of unexpected benefits. First were the snails which are another Cypriot delicacy. Otto was complaining of an upset stomach after only 35 snails. No I did not partake of the snails I have to draw the line somewhere. Maybe next time.
The other amazing thing was that springtime came again. Suddenly out in the brown and parched orchards and olive groves the leaves turned green and fresh grass appeared out of the hard sun-baked clay. Very strange indeed to see this occur in October.
OK I know I am not a fashion guru. I prefer to delude myself that fashions will one day get around to the crumpled brown corduroy look and I will be trendy. I do have one observation though. While sitting in the arrivals lounge at Paphos 'International' Airport I had a revelation. Why is it that larger ladies with extremely tight see-thru white trousers insist on wearing a thong? Please ladies spare us. It is not fashionable or tasteful. It never was and it never will be. I had planned to get photographic evidence to accompany this note but then decided I did not want to see the inside of a Cypriot prison. I have seen the film Midnight Express and have a suspicion that a Cypriot prison may be similar to a Turkish one. Let’s just call a truce. I promise I won't wear Lycra if you promise to wear dark trousers.
One other effect of the weather has been on the electricity supply.
The electric supply has been up and down like the Assyrian Empire. About 3 inches of rain in 90 minutes can do that. Anyway as I said the electric supply went off so I called the landlords agent who also happens to be his brother-in-law to ask him how to switch it back on using the main safety cut out switch. I am outside in the dark with a candle and a mobile phone peering into a wooden box that houses the main fuses on the side of the house.
Me: "OK I am looking in the main fuse box now."
Agent: "Good. You should see 2 buttons. One red and one white."
Me: "OK.”
Agent: "Now press the red one then the white one and that will bring the power back on."
Me: "Mmmm. OK I tried that and it did not work."
Agent: "Well that is the procedure."
Me: "What about this black button above the other two?"
Agent: "Black button? Sorry don't know anything about that one."
Guess which button turned the power back on?
How to determine if a house is owned by an ex-pat
It is easy really you look to see if the house has a roof. If it has a roof then it is owned by an ex-pat if not then it is owned by a Cypriot. The more astute reader will now be asking the question 'Why would a house not have a roof?'. The answer is two-fold.
By leaving off the roof and using a flat concrete base that has been waterproofed you can always extend the house upwards at a later date. This is useful in Cypriot society where they have extended families and it is the father's responsibility to provide a home for his daughter and new son-in-law when she marries. Indeed this is the reason that the Cypriot will tell you there is no roof.
The ex-pats are more cynical about it. They believe it is because when a house is completed with a roof then there is a substantial 'Completion Tax' due on the property.
There are some very old properties here without rooves!
Someone had doubts about a comment I made in a previous note about the nearby church and whether or not it really does have a loudspeaker to broadcast to the neighbourhood. Well here it is...
.. and finally one whole brownie point to those who noticed the Monty Python reference. That does not include you Ian as you have the script memorized.
The old market next to the abandoned mosque in Paphos next is a small island in this storm of building activity. There are a group of old-fashioned open fronted shops with their owners making every conceivable object from metal and wood. Tables, chairs, cabinets, pots, pans, buckets and all made by hand in front of your eyes. Amid this the old ladies scurry back and forth from their coffee shops to the store owners carrying small cups of thick strong Greek coffee. Each coffee cup only the size of an egg cup but always accompanied by a glass of water. In front of the coffee shops the taxi drivers sit and play backgammon and small groups of passers-by gather to watch. The smell of the coffee, the wood from the carpenter’s shops is wonderful. Nearby there is a small street where the villagers from outlying towns come to sell their produce. Apples, pears, nuts, beans, fresh vegetables and host of other things that I do not recognize and certainly could not pronounce the Greek names. This is a world away from the large supermarkets and modern antiseptic malls I am more familiar with.
Old fossils in Cyprus
So you thought I was the only old fossil here. Seems that the BBC are on my trail. I am expecting a camera crew at the door any moment.
Check this out http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/science/nature/6043648.stm
Kleftiko
In a previous note I mentioned eating a local specialty dish 'kleftiko'. The origins of the word Kleftiko are from 'kleftis' meaning a thief. The 'kleftiko' is traditionally a sheep or goat that has been stolen and then cooked in a shallow pit dug by the poachers. Nowadays the meat is purchased from the butcher and cooked in one of the traditional ovens.
At Jimmy the scouser’s housewarming/leaving party kleftiko was prepared and cooked by Jimmy's landlord Christakis (or Chris as he is known by the ex-pats). I say housewarming/leaving because Jimmy has never actually stayed there and has now gone back to the UK to nurse his lady friend while she convalesces from her cataract operation.
The food was delicious and afterwards Chris told a story of how when he was a boy in Northern Cyprus before partition he and his brother went walking in the mountains where his grandfather's goats were grazing. While there they smelled kleftiko cooking and after searching up and down wind they discovered a goat roasting inside a hidden pit dug in the ground and covered with the goatskin and branches and leaves. As they waited an old man with the traditional Greek handle-bar mustache approached carrying a flagon of red wine. It was apparent that he was the thief who had returned to enjoy his booty.
He sat down and invited them to drink a large cup of the wine even though they far too young. They refused at first but he was so insistent they eventually agreed and had a large cup of wine each. The old man did not drink. When they had finished the drink the old man uncovered the kleftiko to eat. The two boys however could hardly eat a thing. The old man told them how he had tricked them both as by drinking the wine first had sated their appetite and he would now eat the lion's share of the goat. He then proceeded to eat the entire goat while the two boys looked on.
Weather
Do not let anyone tell you that it does not rain in Cyprus. This is not true. What they mean is for long summer months there is no rain at all. Then when it does decide to rain they have some truly awesome storms. The thunder and lightning has to be seen to be believed and the hailstones well... if I told you they were as big as golf balls that would be a lie however they are big enough to put dents in the bonnet of your car and tear holes in the fly screens on the windows.
We sat and watched while the planes continued to try and land at Paphos airport in the middle of this storm. The lightning was flashing on all sides of the planes and they appeared so pathetic and fragile. Yes I have seen the Van Der Graaf generator tests (For the sad old ones reading this I am talking Robert J. and not the 70s rock band) and I know the theory that the electrostatic charge only touches the very surface of the object it strikes but theory goes out the window when put to so practical a test. It did nothing for my pteromerhanophobia and only confirmed my prejudice that airline companies care nothing for passenger safety and only for profit. Heaven help the poor people who were up there in those planes trying to land before they closed the airport.
I have started to attend night school classes in Greek in a village called Emba a little further down the hill. Last Monday night's class was held in the middle of a mighty thunder and lightning storm. The class had just started when the school building shook to its foundations as it was struck by lightning. Being in a building which is struck by lightning is not an experience I care to repeat. We lost all power except to the alarms so class for that evening was cancelled. Almost as bad was the car journey home as the roads that lead up the hills had turned to Water courses for the flooding. Only later did I find out that another car with a husband and wife in it driving between Emba and another village had been swept away into a ravine by the torrent. As I write this they are still searching for the body of one of the occupants.
The rain did have a couple of unexpected benefits. First were the snails which are another Cypriot delicacy. Otto was complaining of an upset stomach after only 35 snails. No I did not partake of the snails I have to draw the line somewhere. Maybe next time.
The other amazing thing was that springtime came again. Suddenly out in the brown and parched orchards and olive groves the leaves turned green and fresh grass appeared out of the hard sun-baked clay. Very strange indeed to see this occur in October.OK I know I am not a fashion guru. I prefer to delude myself that fashions will one day get around to the crumpled brown corduroy look and I will be trendy. I do have one observation though. While sitting in the arrivals lounge at Paphos 'International' Airport I had a revelation. Why is it that larger ladies with extremely tight see-thru white trousers insist on wearing a thong? Please ladies spare us. It is not fashionable or tasteful. It never was and it never will be. I had planned to get photographic evidence to accompany this note but then decided I did not want to see the inside of a Cypriot prison. I have seen the film Midnight Express and have a suspicion that a Cypriot prison may be similar to a Turkish one. Let’s just call a truce. I promise I won't wear Lycra if you promise to wear dark trousers.
One other effect of the weather has been on the electricity supply.
The electric supply has been up and down like the Assyrian Empire. About 3 inches of rain in 90 minutes can do that. Anyway as I said the electric supply went off so I called the landlords agent who also happens to be his brother-in-law to ask him how to switch it back on using the main safety cut out switch. I am outside in the dark with a candle and a mobile phone peering into a wooden box that houses the main fuses on the side of the house.
Me: "OK I am looking in the main fuse box now."
Agent: "Good. You should see 2 buttons. One red and one white."
Me: "OK.”
Agent: "Now press the red one then the white one and that will bring the power back on."
Me: "Mmmm. OK I tried that and it did not work."
Agent: "Well that is the procedure."
Me: "What about this black button above the other two?"
Agent: "Black button? Sorry don't know anything about that one."
Guess which button turned the power back on?
How to determine if a house is owned by an ex-pat
It is easy really you look to see if the house has a roof. If it has a roof then it is owned by an ex-pat if not then it is owned by a Cypriot. The more astute reader will now be asking the question 'Why would a house not have a roof?'. The answer is two-fold.
By leaving off the roof and using a flat concrete base that has been waterproofed you can always extend the house upwards at a later date. This is useful in Cypriot society where they have extended families and it is the father's responsibility to provide a home for his daughter and new son-in-law when she marries. Indeed this is the reason that the Cypriot will tell you there is no roof.
The ex-pats are more cynical about it. They believe it is because when a house is completed with a roof then there is a substantial 'Completion Tax' due on the property.
There are some very old properties here without rooves!
Someone had doubts about a comment I made in a previous note about the nearby church and whether or not it really does have a loudspeaker to broadcast to the neighbourhood. Well here it is...
.. and finally one whole brownie point to those who noticed the Monty Python reference. That does not include you Ian as you have the script memorized.
posted by /s at 1:01 pm
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